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An Open Letter,
To the old-timer who sat in front of me during the Vox Angelica performance in Huntsville last Friday night. For the purpose of his identification, this gentleman was tall, wore a yellow sweater-vest, his glasses were on a lanyard, he has a daughter called “Summer,” and was talking to a couple who seemed to be in town from Alaska. During the intermission, he spoke with another gentleman who seemed to be French. He looked and comported himself like a common socialist academic.
Dear Sir,
Thank you for your tutelage. Were it not for your excellent commentary, both during the performance and intermission, my wife and I would have had the poor taste to enjoy the performance. The trouble is that neither of us normally ingest very much choral music of the sort performed that night. In fact, the only reason we had attended in the first place was that one of the performers is a colleague of my wife.
We were noticeably confused, through our lack of education and refinement, by what sounded to us to be an excellent presentation of Modern English carols. We did not even understand, in our ignorance, that we were supposed to execrate the concept of the Modern English carol. Now that we have been exposed to them, we may condemn them with our noses held high! Though they sounded quite nice, we were not fooled!
We also were not fooled by the enjoyment portrayed by the performers. They are performers after all, and their seeming satisfaction with a job well-done was no doubt some sort of subtle subplot designed to draw attention away from that fetid heap of a concert.
When the performance was over, we though it was not a second too soon. We, like you, were wroth with the audience for having the pluck to applaud, let alone stand. However, on the matter of the standing ovation, I pointed out to my wife that it was more likely a function of being able to get out of those horrid pews than to show any affection to the performers.
My wife and I had never attended a Vox Angelica performance before. With any luck, we shall seek you out at next year’s performance as well, so as to continue the lesson of putting one’s head up one’s arse in public settings that you taught so well this time around.
Sincerely,
The Editor
Did you learn anything?
Last week, whilst in Vietnam, an idiot reporter asked President Bush a question, to the effect of, “Do you think that there is anything that the {failed} Vietnam war could teach you about how you should be handling the Iraqi war?”
I didn’t listen to his response because I was talking over it. My response was, “Of course. When there’s a war that needs to be won, best get in, win it decisively, and above all, do that fast before the democrats get a chance to get themselves elected to a majority in congress just to make sure you loose it.”
That should be the lesson we learned from Vietnam.
This morning….
Yesterday were the Iraqi elections. So, this morning I’m driving to work… And I have Sirius Satellite Radio. My normal morning fare is the Tony Snow show on 142 Sirius Right. Tony is a little bit goofy, a lot big Boy Scout. So I can relate to him more than most people, I guess. Tony spent the first 15 minutes of his show absolutely giddy. Proud of our country. Proud that the Iraqi people got to experience the privilege we take for granted far too often. I listened to his whole first segment, and couldn’t help but smile.
Then I flipped over to Sirius 144 Air America, just because I was feeling particularly evil. I came in at the beginning of the second segment of this show. I’m not sure what the name of the show was, but it was two women, talking back and forth. In that whole segment, they talked about the Iraqi election for about 15 seconds. It was pretty much dismissed as “what-EVER. That was so last week, and we’re bored with it.” They didn’t actually say those words, but that accurately describes the tone. Instead, the topic of conversation was Condi Rice’s hair. Apparently, she changed it recently, and it looks like a “helmet” now (their words, not mine). They spent about 7 or 8 minutes on Condi’s freaking hair. I don’t know what to say. Vapid. Ignorant. Morons. I actually felt myself getting dumber sitting there listening to these people have a serious discussion about how America is going to hell because they didn’t like the Secretary of State’s hair style.
Nothing like a serious discussion of the issues. And I mean, this was nothing like a serious discussion of the issues.
Also in the news today… A woman on unemployment in Germany is about to have her benefits suspended because there is an employer willing to offer her a job. The only problem is that this new employer just happens to be a brothel. The job just happens to be that of prostitute. I can’t find the original link I read this morning, but this one sums it up nicely.
Just remember, a liberal is a person who sees an underage girl performing sex acts live on stage, and wonders if she is getting paid minimum wage.
